Don't worry, be happy

Today was not a good day for me.  It was one of those days when nothing went right, my job was overwhelming and people annoyed me.  All of these things combined together kept my temper short and my patience nil.  Days like today remind me that I need to pull back and not take out my irritations on those around me or people I have to speak to on the phone.  I think there is girl in China who is afraid of me now.

Sometimes we are not aware how impactful even the smallest things we say or do in our everyday lives can be to others. The way we treat people, the things we give people may seem insignificant at the time, but can have lasting implications. I was reminded of this today by a comment a friend made. Yesterday was my birthday, so last night I posted an album of pictures of me on my earliest birthdays and scanned pictures of some birthday cards dating back to my first birthday. First of all, I would never have had these buried treasures if my mother had not had the sentimentality to save them for me. She had a file folder in her filing cabinet for each one of us, and she kept mementos of our lives in those files. She gave me mine several years ago to take home, and I just stuffed it in a box for later. Well, last night was my later, and I was astonished at how many birthday cards and pictures she had actually kept for me. This small act on my mother’s part salvaged memories for me that otherwise I would have never recollected on my own.

One of the cards I found was a birthday card my sister, Barbara had given me on my 10th birthday. On the front is a picture of Holly Hobby, a hobby of mine at one time, with the title, A Birthday Greeting, Sister - With Loving Memories. She had stuffed it with pictures of Holly Hobby she had cut out of other things.  There are two things about my sister that anyone who knew her or knew of her will confirm. She never forgot a birthday. Never. If you were any friend to her at all you would receive a birthday card from her every year. The second thing about her is she wrote the year in the bottom right corner of every card she sent. How else would I have known she gave me that particular card in 1976? Bless her for that. It's because of her I find myself doing the same thing with cards, Christmas ornaments, pictures, etc. etc.  When I found that card from her it was like she was sending me a birthday card from heaven and a gift of those cut-outs as well. As it said, A Birthday Greeting, Sister - With Loving Memories. Loving memories, indeed.  I’m sure in 1976 shortly after she graduated from college and was starting her teaching career she would have never guessed that 30 years later the simple act of sending a birthday card to her baby sister would be so important to her. 

You see, these small things, like the "in on the secret" wink my brother-in-law John used to give me, the silly postcards and letters my friend Jimmy and I used to exchange, the satsumas I shared with my four-year old nephew one December afternoon, the positive acknowledgements we give and receive for a job well done or just to be thoughtful; these small things are the things that make memories and lasting impressions, even if we don't realize it at the time. These are gifts that cost us little or nothing to give, but invaluable to receive.

Inevitably I will have more bad days like today and my irritations will show, but hopefully I will think of my sister’s heaven-sent birthday greeting and my mother’s foresight to preserve my childhood and I will stop before I give those around me unpleasant memories of me.  Life is too short to spend it spreading ill will.  It is much more enjoyable to spread the Loving Memories.