My first glimpse on this new year of life was a crystal clear sky speckled with stars. I stood in the driveway, looking up, and breathed in the cold, crisp air as I watched two satellites glide through the sky and listened to a faraway coyote giving up one last howl before dawn. Another year, another day to celebrate the day I was born.
I awoke this morning with a thankful heart. Thank you, God, for giving me a chance at life. I am sorry I have not lived it to its fullest potential, but I try. I measure it by the day, not by the year. It has had its joyful days, sorrowful days, peaceful days, regretful days, and amazing days. Each one a lifetime lived. Each one a new chance to do it better.
Thank you Mama and Daddy for accepting me into your already too big family and crowded house. You had six children, a recent miscarriage, three bedrooms (not counting the mother-in-law rooms), two full-time jobs and one bathroom yet you brought me into this world and made room for me. That couldn’t have been easy, yet you made sure I never knew any different.
Until about five minutes ago I used to hate having a birthday so soon after Christmas and the new year. The new year begins and boom, birthday. There’s nothing to look forward to for the rest of the year. Today I see it differently. I’ve always liked the month of January. I like the way the word looks on paper. I like the fickle weather and the assortment of birds it brings to feed on the abundant sunflower seeds my husband provides for them daily. I like the look of the sky viewed through leafless trees and how the green that is left is more vivid by contrast. I like the chore of redecorating my house after the holidays. It gives me a reason to change things up and bring out old things and display them in a new way. I like the feeling January brings of a new chance to do right, whatever needs to be rightly done. And this year I especially like the rhythm of the numbers 1/11/22. I’ll have it, yes, please and thank you.
I had a distant cousin who didn’t believe in getting presents for his birthday. He believed if there were presents to be shared he should be the one to give them. So my gift to you is advice. Embrace your age. Every year that passes is a gift. Don’t dread the number that changes when the calendar falls on your birthday. Sure, it gets higher but with every flip of digits you have life. The wrinkles are going to come, the hair is going gray, glasses happen. You can fight all you want to preserve the outside package, but it won’t stop the earth from its elliptical orbit around the sun. It’s what you tend in your heart and in your dreams that keeps you ageless. Goodness breeds abundance, evil multiplies destruction. (This last sentence doesn’t really go with what I’m saying, but no matter how many times I’ve deleted it I feel compelled to put it back. It must be important. You’re welcome.)
One more thing as far as birthdays go. I’ve had my share of disappointments that are no one’s fault but my own. Regardless of what you may think, you are responsible for your own happiness. If you want your birthday to be a special day then do something that will make it special to you. For me, I’m going to dress like the 20 year-old I am in my heart. I’m just happy, and thankful, that I’ve got another one to add to the tally.
